I Give World, I Give

So we’ve been dealing with all of this stuff with M and getting custody of him. Mr. G’s command won’t give him leave unless he has a court hearing to attend so it’s been stressful but it’s been what it is. The past couple of times we went to see M/go to court, we were supposed to be driving Mr. G’s car but we can’t because the state of Minnesota keeps getting his orders and not realizing what they are. So they’ve chucked them. When you add up the express postage to and from MN TWICE we could have just paid full price for the damn tags already. Especially when you add up the rental fees from having to rent a car to get to M because my car can’t make the trip.

 

We’re also PCSing. Packout is June 20th. We’ve gotten some stuff to work on the yard but we still need to replace a door, handle the coat hanger in the drain sitch, and patch up some plaster from where the house has settled (it was buillt in the 1960s). That’s all prep that has to be done before we rent it out. There’s still cleaning and sorting that has to be done, including the scanning of all of our documents because we’ve lived together for 5 years and never had a real filing system. I mentioned my car earlier well I need to replace an O2 sensor in it and do something about the oil. We have to go get M June 6th and take him back July 10th. (We still need to contact the court about scheduling a hearing before Mr. G leaves to set up M’s care in the event that something happens with his grandfather.) There’s all of this money that has to come from somewhere. Even with our tax return (where we claimed neither of the children btw) and me getting school money we’re still in need of substantial funds to get all of this done. (Although we’ve gotten a LOT done. Stuff to get the yard under control, parts for Mr. G’s car, bills, loans paid on so on and so forth.) We just…between not planning as well as we could have and then this court thing dragging out way longer than we were told to expect it’s a hard row to hoe.

 

Oh and we’re still not pregnant. And I know I should NOT care about that right now but I do. A lot. And I feel like maybe I’m not ovulating because I’m fat or maybe there’s too much scar tissue due to the abortion and I missed my chance and I just suck. And it makes me sad. Like miserable. But that’s such a small issue that I feel like sharing it would make me a jerk.

 

I’m just drowning. And I’m by myself. No matter how much of a good friend I am or how much I help others people are always busy when I need help and that’s just life. I’ve got me and myself and that’s it. When shit hits the fan and it gets harder you’re the only person you can count on. So right now I’m drowning. And without heartfelt texts or emails from friends, without handouts or assistance I’m gonna swim to the shore, get out and shake off the water and then keep trucking. But right this second? I’m drowning.

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As If I Wasn’t Busy Enough

So. We have PCS. We have a reenlistment that hasn’t happened yet. We have orders that can’t be cut because of funding. We have a custody battle with a lazy lawyer who we’re not entirely sure is on our side.

Oh yeah I’m in school too. 😀

In spite of all of that I’m undertaking two creative projects. Honestly I might not follow through with them but for right now they’re something that I want to pursue and tell you about.

First off, I’m going to try to get back into my writing. I’ve got all of these ideas running around in my head and plenty of free time since Mr. G is getting ready to deploy. Also I’m getting a new laptop that isn’t missing a L key so who knows what will happen.

Secondly, I’m going to write a business plan. People have been talking about businesses, Shark Tank is back on and once again I’m reminded of a business idea that’s always sort of in the back of my head. Namely whenever I need the services of this business. So…might as well write up the business plan. Maybe I’ll learn something, maybe it’ll just make me hungry. Who knows?

PCS Overload

I’m drowning. There’s SO much to do and I’m really on edge about it. Can this wait? Will I have any help with this? Here’s a quick rundown of everything:

  • Get Mr. G’s car running and registered so he can drive it to check into his new duty station.
  • Check on these random cracks in the ceiling
  • Get someone to remove the coat hanger from the guest bath drain. (Long. Story.)
  • Pick a pack out date keeping in mind PPO will only hold our stuff 90 days
  • Sell my car
  • Buy another car
  • Find a job
  • Work at my job here until the end of May
  • Find a house
  • Decide whether or not to sell or rent out our house here

Yeah it’s all….just a bit much.

Oh The Places You Will Go

Mr. G FINALLY got ahold of the detailer. I have no idea what the guy was doing or why he didn’t set something up to let people know he was going to be unavailable. I don’t really want to know. Because if it’s some random bullshit I’m gonna get extremely annoyed and I already have a migraine. And besides being positive gets you further in life and the phone call was productive.

 

We’re NOT needs of the Navy right now and Mr. G gets to pick orders. Only once though. He got PTS approved in December (on the final look…talk about cutting it close) BUT the sticky wicket was that Dec was also his last month to look at orders. So he got approved on December 17th and yeah…the holidays and having to go out of town to spend Christmas with M…..life happened and the dude (detailer) just never picked up the phone. Honestly it’s always something. Last time we were up for orders we got orders to Hawaii and then all of that was put on hold due to it being the close of the fiscal year and when it all opened up again, the orders had been given away. I can’t help but think of how different our life would be.

I don’t know where we’ll end up. I know where we hope we’ll end up but honestly we could go anywhere. As long as the family court judge in Ohio sees fit to let M live with us permanently where he belongs after hearing about it I don’t really care. We’ll figure out the rest when we get to it.

Order pickin’ goes down tonight at 6pm or first thing tomorrow morning. Fingers crossed!

Christmas with M and my Mom

So we went to spend two days with M. Christmas Eve and the day before. It was nice. His grandfather is incredibly kind and most of his family is actually. A lot of lies have been told and at the end of the day I’m just sad about it because things didn’t have to be like this. If she’d just told the truth and used a little bit of common sense…things wouldn’t be so hard for M now. It breaks my heart for him. But things will get better if I keep believing in that.

I got to see my mom and dad!!! I…I love them so much. It really recharged my batteries to see them and know they’re doing well. Christmas is such a family time I would have been really bummed out if I hadn’t been able to see at least some of my family.

 

A new year is coming and it’s bringing a new addition to our household, new adventures and a new duty station. I’m stoked!