I suck at making and keeping friends. I’m moody, I communicate poorly, and I’m terminally late. That’s my life. It is what it is. I’m 22 and while I can change some things, (I’ve been really working on time management), some things are just what they are. I will always be moody unless I’m on pills and I have yet to find a pill that doesn’t make me a robot. So some of my personality defects that make me this awful horrible person that no one can seem to find it within themselves to like for any decent length of time or love completely will never go away. I will always be screwed up. That’s just what it is.
That being said it’s really bothering me more today than usual. Maybe it’s because things are stressful with Mr. G and I could really use some friends that just listen and say the right thing. Or do the right thing. I like to get out but I like to stay in too. I’m not a giant party animal and I’m poor to boot. I just…I want to be understood. And I want people who claim to want to make connections to actually follow through. I’m tired of fake people and just…I’m tired. Of everything.