No I haven’t dived completely off the deep end into a land of narcissism and delusion. I just had an epiphany.
When it comes to why you do something or why you feel a certain way it has to be about you. You can only change you, you can only predict what you are gonna do, you can only control you. Should you have other people involved in your life? Yes. But can you base everything that you do on them? Nope. Well you can but you’ll be miserable and defeated in about .06 seconds. Being constantly defeated, upset, heartbroken and annoyed about something you can’t change is just…..painful. It’s masochism at its finest. Don’t live that way boo boo.
There are many things in life that I have done for other people. My mother, my husband, my friends. I start out one way and then hear a bunch of static from the opposition and I shift. There’s always a variety of reasons: I don’t want to disappoint them, I wonder if maybe they know more than I do about the situation and I don’t want them to hate me for the choice that I make. At the end of the day none of that matters because I have to live with the choices I make and the outcomes they produce.